This information is a courtesy from Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services; and as such, applies to the Province of Ontario. It is meant to inform people of information they may need in future or of which they are unaware; and to demystify issues concerning death and dying so that there is clearer understanding.
TODAY'S TOPIC: THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT FUNERALS & COSTS
Death and taxes are inevitable. They've both been around for a long time. Funerals too. But funerals as we think of them, are neither inevitable these days nor must they take the shape of what we consider to be “normal." When people ask me what is normal, I make it clear that there is no normal. That's it.
Contrary to how it may seem, there are aspects to making funeral arrangements that are very much under YOUR CONTROL, and I'll go over what those are shortly. Funeral home price lists will have a number of packages with varying names and services. They may have packages that are so varied in their descriptions that the clarity of the list becomes an exercise in breaking a code as to what it is you want, and what it might cost. This becomes all the more difficult if one is not used to the terminology. Regardless of the numerous options available and the manner in which package costs are broken down, there are ALWAYS things that can be added if desired and things not necessarily needed.
To keep it simple, there are technically four types of services and they are listed here in (usual) order of most costly to least costly:
1. TRADITIONAL SERVICE - a service with the body present.
2. MEMORIAL SERVICE - a service where a cremation or aquamation has already occurred.
3. GRAVESIDE SERVICE - a service held at the graveside only, either full body or remains.
4. BASIC DIRECT CREMATION, AQUAMATION or BURIAL - no visitation or service that the funeral home is involved in.
In addition, the term CELEBRATION OF LIFE might be used and/or listed as a service, which can indicate a great many things. To me, a Celebration of Life Service, connotes a service or rather “gathering" that is less formal, more casual and has the feel of inviting people to your home for catch-up time or a sharing of conversation. Some people use the term to mean “party." A celebration of life is quite open to interpretation and the manner in which you would like to honour someone. A body or remains may or may not be present.
When looking at a price list, the packages themselves are usually broken down into three main categories. For example, within any of the service types listed above you will have costs listed for:
PROFESSIONAL & STAFF SERVICES - meaning professional fees, coordinating rites and services, documentation, preparation of remains, transport of remains, staffing, facilities, vehicles, etc.
SUPPLIES - meaning things you purchase like a casket or an urn, cremation jewellery, vault, stationery, etc.
DISBURSEMENTS - meaning things the funeral home pays for on your behalf, that go to second parties and are put into the contract; like the cost of the cremation fee that gets paid to the crematorium, or the cost of a newspaper notice that gets paid to the newspaper. Clergy honorarium, flowers, the cremation itself, municipal death registration fee, etc. are all disbursements.
These three “sub-headings" under any one of the funeral home packages, comprise the entire contract. Within those sub-headings things may be removed if not needed or added if desired, depending upon what you wish to do.
THINGS TO NOTE - Without sitting down with a funeral director and going over your specific wishes, there are only two types of services that can be quoted over the phone in their entirety, including all applicable taxes, right off the bat - a BASIC DIRECT CREMATION or a BASIC DIRECT AQUAMATION. The reason these two can be quoted complete is due to the fact that there are no real variables in them. They are pretty straightforward.
Be aware that sometimes, when a funeral home tells you the cost of a service, or you see the service on a price list, it is probably the cost of only the Professional & Staff Services and NOT the supplies or disbursements that would go into that service.
Why? Because as I said, other than a Basic Direct Cremation or Aquamation, the funeral home can't know what supplies you want or what disbursements are needed or desired without going over options with you - but they CAN give you the cost of the Professional and Staff Services because those are the funeral home's costs. The other stuff depends upon what you want to do. So, make sure you know what they are quoting you and be specific.
KEEPING COSTS DOWN: There are ways in which the costs of a funeral need not get out of hand. Here they are. The most variable cost of any funeral home service is that of a casket or the urn that is chosen. There are caskets that range from $1,500 up to $14,000. There are urns that range from $200 up to $3,000. In between that wide range are some beautiful selections. Likewise, the family might have a receptacle, a family heirloom, that holds meaning for them. I have placed remains into a cookie jar, a fire extinguisher, an empty shell from a naval vessel, etc.
There are numerous options as to where a service might be held that will cause the price of the service to change.
There are disbursements that are NOT a necessity, like a newspaper notice (it's free on a funeral home website), or flowers, or an honorarium if you have a family member who wishes to speak instead of clergy, etc.
If the wishes of the deceased were never specified you might select one that fits what it is you want to do. On a side note; cremation or aquamation gives you the luxury of time. Once the cremation or aquamation has taken place, you may do a service wherever and whenever you wish.
AND FINALLY - There are those who feel that if there is no public service being held, there is no caring, and this is simply and completely untrue! The two are NOT synonymous. Besides the two most obvious reasons for not having a public service: 1. the deceased did not wish it or 2. there are no family or friends left to warrant it - the important thing to keep in mind is that in some way, at some time, that person's life should be honoured and there are many ways to do that - with or without a funeral home being involved.
This information is a courtesy from Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services; and as such, applies to the Province of Ontario. It is meant to inform people of information they may need in future or of which they are unaware; and to demystify issues concerning death and dying so that there is clearer understanding.
